How to go unprepared for a Trekking trip 101

So, I thought I’d officially start the year with a bang and went for a trip to Ooty with friends from college. There were 16 of us and to keep it short – it was fun. But this isn’t about the trip as a whole.

This is about one particular aspect of the trip – trekking up a hill in almost completely uncharted territory. To be more precise, this is about how to go unprepared for said trip.

How to go unprepared for a Trekking trip

Aim: To make an itinerary of all the items that would be detrimental to a trekking trip and procedures to follow that would effectively endanger your life and those of others with you.

Apparatus Required:

1) Sandals with no traction – 1
2) Sprain in leg – 1 (Maximum of 2)
3) Cotton clothing for effectively letting the chill get to you
4) Foolhardiness – As much as possible

Procedure:

1) Start with letting your friends plan a trip. Initially, refuse to go along so that you’re absent from the planning sessions. When you agree to go along, make sure you forget the fact that a trekking trip has been planned.

2) Do not forget to act tough and not take any type of protective clothing even though you are going to a hill station and you know about it.

3) Make sure you don’t have enough sleep because you know sleeping on a bus with 15 friends (who talk themselves to high glory) is quite easy.

4) Start the trekking trip with minimal energy. This is essential to gathering the grit to go till the very top.

5) Remember to sprain your ankle a little on each leg so that it gets worse by the time you’re done.

6) Start the trek

7) Remember to keep your foolhardiness at max throttle and agree to move forward on unused slippery muddy pathways.

8) Take support from people on both sides of you. This way, you’ll feel safe that when you fall, you won’t be the only one going down.

9) Do not think about the way back and how much more difficult it is to stop yourself while slipping down the muddy pathways.

10) Reach the top. Stop for photos on the way when there is enough foliage to literally hide an elephant.

11) Start the trek downhill. This is the part where the fun starts.

12) Hold on to maximum number of people so that you can take everyone down when you go. For best effects, make sure the people on both your sides are light ones. This will help in bringing down the whole group a lot faster (Satti’s Weight Disproportionality Theorem).

13) Break a few toe nails so that you can feel the pain when you are trying not to slip.

14) A few thorns all over your body will also help. For good measure, make sure they’re poisonous.

15) Hope that the sprain in your ankle acts up to make your job all the tougher.

16) Get down and look at your feet. Mud should have crusted all over your nails (the ones that aren’t missing), mud over your pants and T Shirt(which should have been black for maximum effect).

17) Make sure you come back into your room with said filthy sandals and then realise the fact. Reminisce about the trip and write a blog post on the one part you think would not be all that boring to read.

Conclusion: To decrease your chances of coming back alive, do not go for a trekking trip with your head in the right place or traction in your footwear.

Of course, the trip on the whole was awesome. My sarcasm is directed wholly on myself and my stupidity for not being prepared for a trekking trip.

The fun-nest days ever!

I’ve been meaning to write this for quite a while but a series of activities involving my full concentration (reading cracked, playing games etc) have deterred this task till today. But it gave me the opportunity to put up “J entry” as a task in the Astrid app in god-frickin-awesome phone (which I try to mention in every entry J )

Anyway, this week was one of the best ever. College life seems a lot more fun now. Unlike last semester, I’m a bit more active these days and move around with the “gang” a lot more than I used to. Anyway, all this started on this Sunday.

11/01/2010:

I woke up pretty late but found out that the guys were going out to eat. I presumed it was the Dhaba and followed considering that I really needed an outing and that they would not buy me any food if I asked for it. But surprise, surprise, they were planning on a trip to “That’s Y Food”! If I haven’t mentioned it till now, that is THE most awesome restaurant in all of Coimbatore and bookings are almost always full. But pre-booking for a set of 10 people is not something they can ignore and we were there at about 13:40 hours … A train ride and an auto ride later.

We ordered amazing food and had an even more amazing time. There were 10 of us exactly from what I remember – Shiva, Ajay, SM, Saksham, Sid, Amith, Sarath, Gautham, Yadhu and me. There was the fun we made of each other and going to that small bathroom in huge groups just to show the EEE gang (who were new to the place) the “10 Commandments” poster, meeting KG and some of the EIE and also the other buggers from CSE and EEE.

The Ten Commandments of using a toilet

I also had my first taste of chicken there. I know … It’s a HUGE deal, isn’t it? But then, I think Amith’s philosophy is the best – Try everything once … Experiences will take you a long way in life. We left after our meal – which came to about 200 bucks a head for filling us to the gills with food (I know … Plain awesome!) –, we went in different directions. That is to say, ECE went one way while EEE went the other. We had nothing to do so we went to Bonbon and ate some ice cream (instead of that melt-in-the-mouth mud soufflé or the newly discovered Ferrero Rocher Smoothie in That’s Y … I should try the latter the next time I go there).

We took an auto to the station after that and left by the 16:40 train to college. When we landed in college, we found the caravan of Amma going past the gates to take the freeway gate that we are not allowed to use. To fudge with that … All SM and I noticed was the white Mercedes she was travelling in and the RV that followed. Ah me … If only I could learn to preach philosophy in a convincing manner, life would be all the better.

But then, this was NOT the best part … That was the next day.

12/01/2010:

Monday – I hate this day of the week the most like every other guy. It has all the essential things which are needed to spoil the start of a week – boring lectures, lab and all that crap. But this Monday, things were going to be different.

The first period was Fuel Cells. If I haven’t mentioned this anywhere before, it is one of the 2 electives that our class was offered and I, along with every other fun guy in class, took this one. Since we share both electives with EIE, we have to go to their class while guys from EIE who took Electrochemistry – the other elective – have to come to our class. Fortunately for us, EIE people – who are the coolest on most counts in our college – thought that a Monday like this should not be wasted and went off for the Amma Darshan which our college was sponsoring transport to. So we were left early since there was no one left to take class for.

While we were loitering around in the corridor with our free period in hand, we made a group and discussed things out. We came to the awesome conclusion that we should go for that Amma Darshan and then go to the city for some fun. We asked permission from Kirthika ma’am (who is our class counsellor or advisor, I dunno which), who in turn asked the HOD and we got our permission. Yeah, that’s right … The whole frickin class was allowed to go for the Amma Darshan. We left without delay – or as little delay as possible by a college bus.

The fun started on the bus itself. When people like the ones in my class are put in one place, things get really, really awesome and to be sure, it did. We literally rocked the bus with all our singing and dancing and “koothu adichufying”. We sang all the way till we reached the Amma Darshan place.

Catchword - "TERROR"!

We un-boarded and went off into that place and registered our names. Then, we got together and planned to get out of there. But this time, the fun was supposed to be more since we were taking the girls along with us. We left via a small village road all the while checking if Joshi was around and escaped as safely as possible under the circumstances. Once on the city roads, we were left looking for means of transport and came up with the best we could … We hired three taxis and paid 200 bucks to each to leave us at the theatre. We reached there and booked tickets for the “Pyaar Impossible” movie. Then, after some convincing and a stint at Annapoorna for the veggies, all of us reached the Sampoorna hotel. The food wasn’t spectacular but we had fun with the others jabbing at Maheshwari and the Badugas (her ”tribe”) in general – until she got pissed off and they all stopped (Notice how I say “they” and not “we” and to be honest, it was getting extremely lame with every testosterone charged homo sapien trying to fight the other for attention and humour).

Then we went for the movie (where Shiva cleverly engineered the seating arrangements to his own needs) and I swear on god as we all thought … It was an IMPOSSIBLE movie. Absolute bull shit and a waste of probably crores of rupees, which could have been used for the betterment of mankind in general. It was a fiasco … in every sense of the word.

After the movie, we were in a dilemma as to where to go and the group came together for a discussion again. The proper decision was obvious to Abhiram; me and Pradeep didn’t care too much. So, while these buggers were trying to act all corporate-decision-making-stereotyped-awesome-alpha-males, Pradeep and I did the wise thing and went off to have a Coke :D. The group of around 22 – Abhi, Amith, Aparna, Archana, Arun, Devika, Keerthika, Maheshwari, Neelima, Haareeth, Pradeep, Sharath, Sathyaraj, Shiva, Shruthi, Sukanya, Unnimaya, Abhinaya, Varsha, some woman whose name I never learnt, Archana C.K and myself – finally came to the decision that we should take a taxi back to that Nallampalayam place where the Darshan was going on and catch a late bus from there back to college so that we can skip the next day. We went walking till Baskin and Robbins where some of us bought some ice creams and took a group photo and we boarded the taxis back to Nallampalayam.

Sprite + Vanilla FTW

In Nallampalayam, after some roaming around, all of us got together and sat at a some kind of a congregation for almost an hour and enjoyed ourselves making fun of each other and trying to be awesome for the girls (yeah, me too! 😛 … Though I would say all I had was an epic phail). This sitting around was probably the most awesome thing we did all evening. It really was fun and we took loadsa photos.

Group Comedy

After some time sitting around lazily, we met EEE gang who had come along at about 20:30 or so. After that, we got back to sitting again when this idiotic nut of a teacher came and called the girls for some plate washing. Now, I did vehemently revolt against this because Mahi was looking for support but I tell you this – I did not like it. I mean … Forget the fact that they called only girls for it – Amrita is a gender biased institution for all it otherwise is but they made the students do it. I mean … There are some hundreds of devotees who eat there and if each could wash his own damn plate, there would be no need to call the university girls for such a demeaning job (fuck the proverb which says that no job is demeaning … washing plates without being paid for is very, very disgraceful). Unfortunately, while almost all the girls escaped, Devika and Aparna could not and had to wash some plates.

We, meanwhile, moved to safer places like the playground at the back. There, we had lots more fun climbing those tower like structures and taking photos of people on the top.

3 Idiots ... on a tree.

That, apart from having photos taken by the people at the top.

We were dispersed though, thanks to the appearance of the demonic nemesis of every student at Amrita and a direct, real-life counterpart of the Viru Sahasrabuddhe a.k.a Virus character in the 3 idiots movie – the one, the only, the asshole : Joshi! After that, the group somehow never got together again. We roamed all over the place and the girls decided to leave by the bus at 23:00 or so. After some thought, sathyaraj, arun and abhiram decided to go with them. This effectively meant Amith, Pradeep, Shiva, the EEE gang and myself were left over. We caught ourselves some empty seats at the extreme back end of the auditorium along with a small horde of mosquitoes and talked for a while and drank LMN.

13/01/2010:

At about midnight, we decided to have a walk. Some were willing and some were not so finally, Amith, pradeep, gautham, shiva and me went for the walk along the same village road we had used to leave the place with the girls earlier that day. We reached the main road and again, since we were jobless as usual, took a photo in front of a shutter-closed shop using ingenious techniques of combining flash lights from 2 separate cameras to get a photo in one of them.

Xtreme flashzzz yo!

We had Amrita buses coming and going that way and had lots of fun turning away from the head lights which were hitting us in the face to avoid any form of recognition. The funniest in this regard was Gautham who went “Hood” and put on his hood every time a bus came round the street corner.

After some time, we started the walk back to the darshan place when another wave of lunacy struck us and we put on the “kodana kodi” song and danced to the “oooooo ….” track in the middle of the frickin road under a bright street light. Yes, we are abso-effin-lutely crazy and we are proud of it for the same reason J. Oh btw, we did that twice. We walked back to the darshan place after that.

We were mainly waiting for a performance by Nitin and team. But that got delayed due to a dance by the Baduga people until it was 3 in the morning when they started. I tried taking videos of it as Nitin wanted me to but one fiasco after another, I had epic phail in doing it.

We caught a bus at around 4:30 in the morning and reached the hostel (after a troublesome head light popped off) at about 5:15. We had had more than enough fun where I was concerned. I was so tired that it took me 20 minutes in bed to get some sleep. Kiran tried talking to me but I really wasn’t up to it so I told him to shut up and sleep.

I fell unconscious, I guess. It seems the  3 of them tried waking me up but I just wouldn’t budge and woke up and told them to get lost in their face. Classes were cancelled anyway so it didn’t really matter. But the 6th and 7th hours were there and we attended them. After that was Varsha and Dhanyas treat in the canteen with some limited menu and another buncha photos.

It takes very little food to get everyone together

On the whole, it was an almost unforgettable 24+hours and I lived every moment of it.

At the moment, I’m back at home and have already watched Sherlock Holmes 😀 .. but that later!